I wanted to do a similar speech, like that of America Ferrera in the Barbie movie. I’ve modified it for my DV message, communicating it similarly — BUT gearing it toward a women’s domestic violence survival. After all, it IS domestic violence awareness month…I wanted to do something inspired by #girlpower!
HERE is my interpretation of the “being a woman” speech:
“It is literally impossible to be a domestic abuse survivor. You are so gorgeous, and so intelligent, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough to go on as an independent woman. Like, we have to always be compliant, but somehow we’re always come off as ’extra.’ You have to be attractive, but not too sexy, otherwise you were “asking for it.” And you can never say you want to be sexy. You have to say you want to be unique andoutgoing, but also you have to not be frumpy. You have to be able to be a good earner, but you can’t ask for money, because that’s crass. You have to be ‘in charge’ of the family chaos, but you can’t be head of household, like EVER. You have to lead, but your narcissistic significant other has to pawn all of your ideas off as their own OR shoot them down. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t put those damned kids over your man. You have to be career-minded, but also always abandon your aspirations at the drop of a hat. You have to make excuses for your man’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of nagging and not being a ‘team player.’ You’re supposed to stay a trophy wife/girlfriend for your man, not being able to exist without him, but not so pretty that you tempt other men to have inappropriate thoughts about you OR you would threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always make your family look outwardly successful and always be grateful, but never forget that the system is rigged against you. So find a way to continue the illusion of happiness of your family but also always be grateful that you’re alive. You have to never get bitter, never be rude, never show initiative, never perform ‘self care,’ never fall down, never stop serving, never show fear, never get out of line. It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory, and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you for putting everyone else first. And it turns out, in fact, that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault. I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other victim tie herself into knots so that people will believe us — that we matter as humans. And if all of that is also true for a woman just wanting to survive, then I don’t even know what to say…you’re still a victim of abuse.”
Let me know how you related to what I wrote! Here is the original speech, to check to see how I did (I evolved the original speech):
