I have been recently upgraded to the status of “expert,” according to an article I contributed to recently…and I couldn’t be more excited! Unsure of the signs of gaslighting? Please read this article: https://upjourney.com/examples-of-gaslighting!
Upon checking my “feminine product” supplies, I found I had only a few days of supplies left, but it was not yet time for me to go grocery shopping, which was every two weeks. I told him verbally that I’d need a little money in a few days because I was in the middle of my “time of the month.” He shrugs, says nothing, and leaves for work.
I politely remind him again, the next day, that I needed money to replenish my feminine products He stated that he didn’t have any cash and he’d give me some the following day. I thanked him.
The following day, I politely remind him that I’d run out by the end of that day, so could I please have a little money to go purchase some? He looks at me as if I spoke in Latin and leaves for work abruptly. Desperately, I go through all of my purses while scolding myself: Didn’t you remind him? Did you imagine it and not actually say anything? Plan ahead, dummy! I luckily find a few more feminine napkins and a tampon, so I’m good through the evening. However, I write it on our dry-erase message board, very specific to how much I need and what it’s for. There is NO forgetting this time!
The very next day, I am literally utilizing my very last feminine product! I kiss him as he’s going out the door, leaving for work. I touch his arm, to get his attention.
“Honey, I firmly, but gently, say. “I need $8 for feline products. I’m wearing the last one.” I can see the rage building in his eyes. Then, he blew his top, throwing down his lunchbox with the lunch I had just carefully packed.
“You NEVER said anything!” he yells. “Not my fault you wait until the last possible second! TOO BAD! I don’t have any cash on me! TOUGH. IT. OUT!”
“But —“ I started to object, but he slammed the door in my face. What just happened??? I am really questioning my sanity at this point when I walk to the refrigerator to our dry-erase board. My entry is still there but looks as though he ran his finger through it, partially erasing it. It is, however, still discernible. Okay, maybe I’m NOT crazy! Meanwhile, I scrounged for any money anywhere I could: old purses, under beds, in the couch, in my vehicle, in the laundry room. I even had to raid the kids’ piggy banks, vowing to put it back when I could. However, I was only able to come up with $3.17. Ugh!
For the duration of my menstrual cycle, I had to use the fraying washcloths that I had thrown in my “rag bag” to use as cleaning rags, throwing them promptly away after their “alternate” use. I was embarrassed and grossed out, but I had to do what I had to do!
I have never been so humiliated in my life! I started taking a few dollars out of what he would give me for groceries each week so that NEVER happened again!